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Inside the Church of Schwab

In his 1991 book The Conspirators’ Hierarchy: The Story of the Committee of 300, which I wrote about last week, Dr John Coleman wrote that one of the goals of the global cabal was to create ‘a unified church . . . under their control’.

In a discussion with LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman, Bill Gates has recently given us useless eaters more information about his vision of the new religion

TCW’s intrepid Religious Affairs Correspondent was able to infiltrate the World Economic Forum’s Geneva headquarters to witness the launch of the Church of Schwab. Here is his report.

A BUZZ of excitement permeated the Conference Centre. It was clear that the room was packed with devotees of the new religion. Row after row revealed the usual suspects. I spotted Blair sporting a demonic smirk, a gaunt ghostly Ardern, the deranged Trudeau sharing some medication with a wide-eyed Zelensky, a lonely stony-faced Starmer wallowing in sanctimony, and Macron and Obama sitting together, no doubt discussing what they had in common. Above them, despite the darkness of the balcony, I could discern King Charles, George W Bush, members of the Soros family, a Rothschild or two and other notables.

At precisely nine minutes past nine we were invited to stand. The Bilderberg Male Voice Choir began a rousing version of Handel’s Zadok the Priest. Amongst the basses I could see David Lammy and Boris Johnson, while David Cameron and George Osborne squeaked with the tenors. A wan-looking Matt Hancock performed as a castrato. A procession then emerged from the back of the hall. It was led by an unlikely group of vestal virgins. I identified Nancy Pelosi (with frame), Ursula von der Leyen, Rachel Reeves, Angela Rayner, Christine Lagarde and Hillary Clinton. Following the priestesses was a golden platform pulled by Bill Gates, Yuval Noah Harari, Antonio Guterres and Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus. Seated on the platform was, of course, Klaus Schwab, who waved imperiously to his congregation.

The stage was lavishly decorated with satanic imagery and sculptures of various types of demon. Once Professor Schwab was comfortably ensconced at the centre, Anthony Fauci emerged to deliver the Preface. Slurred readings were given by Kamala Harris and Joe Biden. They were followed by a long rambling sermon from the Professor which ended with a ceremony to bestow sainthoods on Greta Thunberg, Al Gore, Jeffrey Epstein and John Kerry. A blessing was given by Larry Fink, followed by a chant of ‘greed is good’. As the ensemble left the stage a reformed ABBA delivered a rousing performance of their song, Money, Money, Money.

Following the ceremony I was able to have a brief word with some of the attendees. A Jesuit priest called Bergoglio told me how much he approved of a new unified church as he had become rather disenchanted with Catholicism since he became Pope. The departing Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, said he enjoyed the service and promised to promote the new religion after his return to London. David Beckham hoped his attendance would help his quest for a knighthood. Sadiq Khan let me know that he had offered Westminster Abbey as the centre of the new religion.

At lunchtime, the congregation joined Professor Schwab for a five-course meal provided by Arla which included fillet steak (from cattle not fed with Bovaer) and fine wines flown in from Chile and New Zealand.

Before the devotees of the new unified church left for their private jets, the Professor reminded everyone that the new religion was to be compulsory and heretics were to be dealt with by Pfizer.

Schwabism is to be enforced by Nato and it seems likely that many parts of the world will have little choice but to comply. However, problems are anticipated with some residents in Middle Eastern countries.

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